1. Yes, I really do look for newspapers piled up in the driveway or extra full mailboxes. I sometimes leave a pizza flyer on your front door just to see how long it takes you to remove it.
  2. The toy in the front yard gets me to thinking about what kind of electronics the kids have inside and about mommy’s jewelry. Ohh…and I also like those purdy flowers. They tell me you have nice taste on the outside. So, you probably have nice taste on the inside.
  3. I don’t’ mind breaking a window if view of me is obstructed. If your neighbor hears one loud sound, he’ll stop what he’s doing and wait to hear it again. If he doesn’t hear anything else, he’ll go back to what he was doing. That’s human nature and he’s too busy to give it much thought.
  4. Listen, I’m not complaining, but why would you pay all that money for a fancy alarm system and leave your house without arming it?
  5. I love looking in your windows. It’s amazing what I can see in plain sight when I walk or drive through your neighborhood at night and your blinds are open.
  6. I always try the door knobs. You’d be surprised how often they turn. As I glance at the “WELCOME” mat on my way in, I chuckle at the irony.
  7. Trash day?! Oh yea, I know when your neighborhood’s trash days and I like to drive through the night before or the morning of trash-day to take notice of the empty boxes advertising your purchase of that nice new plasma TV, new computer, or gaming system. Personally, IF I bought a new TV, I’d put the box in front of the jerky-neighbor’s home a few houses down.
  8. You think I only break into houses? If your car is not in the garage, I will look inside and see if there is anything I want. And yes, I always check under the seat. I’m not complaining, but you really shouldn’t keep your gun there. I bet there is lot of paperwork involved when you tell the PO-PO I stole your pistol?
  9. I’m old school and don’t often do night time burglaries. I want to avoid you. But seems like night burglaries are getting more popular as more and more of my friends are doing it. They tell me how they are amazed at the people who have alarm systems, but don’t arm them at night.
  10. My night-burglar friends do not like areas with lots of light. So, they usually go around the back where it is darker and less people can see. Those motion sensor lights really tick them off. Sometimes, if they know there is really good stuff on the inside; they will go by during the day and unscrew the bulbs. (while carrying their clip board of course!)
  11. I ALWAYS LOCK MY DOORS & I ALSO HAVE A SECURITY SYSTEM. I set my security system when I am home AND when I go out with the family.